Some of you may know me already, but a-lot has happened since I was last on this site. To date, it has been 5 years 7 months and 6 days since that fatal day. In the last year,life has begun to move in the right direction. With stuff going right for once, It causes me to look back to the first two years of my recovery, which were the toughest years in my life. A 19 yr old boy with divorced parents and a tbi… All the same, two broken up relationships, a tooth implant and a-lot of therapy (still participating), and the beginning of daily meditation, for now, life is going well. After long enough time with my TBI, I have begun to truly realize how out of control my emotions are, but I have learned to stop fighting them and express my thoughts. Yes, they are different and sometimes unconnected, but since that bike accident in the summer of 2011, I have the same name, but a different view on life. If any of you are new to this room, welcome, because through some of the most wicked of times, this site was (still is) filled with those who know what your going through.
Thank you Jason and it appears you are choosing to live a better life. In your life difficulties it appears you are choosing to grow. Your choice is tremendous support and offers this inner strength for me. Your support even makes me feel held up and supportive solidarity. To experience this from you helps to accept “not-knowing” the outcome of things and you help to make it all fine. Thanks for your support, courage and strength, as you helping me to find peace in the “not-knowing.”
You also offer a nice freedom and I experience you not needing to prop yourself up. Just being you is very “good.”
For me I know it is very easy for me to get stuck in a rut. I try not to stay there because I know if I stay there is only one place for me to go and that is down. Ohh believe me I have been there, but the consequences of me staying there are so self destructive it can be very scary, so I try not to. I have different things in my day to occupy my time so I don’t have the time to sit and ponder because I know if I sit and think of my present situation in comparison to my former life pre injury it can be very depressing. Rather than thinking of what I could do before I try to concentrate on what I can do now. Yesterday has gone and I cannot change that, but I can choose to move on. If I keep looking backwards I fall over the opportunities that are right in front of me, so I choose to look forward, not backward.