My husband has brain damage

Hi there. I’m new to the sight, thank you for any input. Though not officially diagnosed yet, we are quite sure my husband has had traumatic brain injury. When he was 10, he fell on his spinal cord and was hospitalized. Then he had numerous football and wrestling concussions over the years. Most recently, we were in a head on collision two years ago 8n which he lost sight to his right eye.

His current symptoms are migraines, constant back, neck and head pain, chronic forgetfulness, difficulty starting or finishing tasks, irregular sleep (2 hours one night, 4 hours the next…skip a night, then 9 hours the next). He has extreme, seemingly uncontrollable emotional ups and downs, social anxiety.
Lastly, he has been running his own business for about 10 years and the stress and hours take an extreme toll on us all.
He is an incredibly smart, hard working, non-complaining man who sees no need for doctors. He simply accepts his body with its disabilities and sometimes incapacitating pains as a part of life. I have incredible respect for him and am not here to complain or rant.
My hope is to learn from others who might experience similarities.
As wife, my goal is to support my husband as best as I can. Here are my questions:

  1. Do his symptoms sound like brain injury? If so, what steps can I take to encourage an independently driven man to seek help?
  2. I am feeling incredible burden as I raise our four children. He works very hard, but regularly needs to sleep out a migraine or cancel on an outting due to forgetfulness or overextending? Are there things I can do to keep from losing my patience or anger with him? I fear I am overextending myself with our kids, too, as i regularly loose my cool, and am overly tired and frustrated by some outside occurrence.
    I feel like we are living in a revolving door of no escape, but I refuse to give up or give (on my husband or a healthy lifestyle).
    Thank you for listening, wisdom and guidance are much appreciated.

Wendy

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Hi Wendy,

I’ve not been on here for quite a long time, I have a brain injury from a 2013 car accident.
I’m not a Dr. but from what you’re explaining about your husband, yes, it does sound like some sort of brain injury, I had and still have some of the same symptoms.

Now we know concussions, even just one, can be terribly dangerous, I was diagnosed with a severe concussion after hitting my head which resulted in seizures, memory loss ( someone can tell me something and I forget, that has got better over time but it’s still pretty bad, it feels as though there’s a block in between my brain which cannot remember.

The migraines were awful too.

This has to be incredibly difficult for you too, very upsetting and overwhelming, your husband may be thinking things will just get better over time and somethings can improve.

I had extensive therapies. There are people who can help your husband and I would think his Dr. is the first person to start with who can refer him. At least that’s what mine did.

I know I was so scared as I felt so different, I just wanted to be me again, I still wish I was the person I was before the accident, there are so many emotions.

I would and still do, get soooo upset or angry, then it’ll pass but some days I’m like a yo yo.

Perhaps you can explain to your husband that it’s worth a try to talk to his Dr. and also that this is affecting you so much too.

I wish you all the best and hope your husband can get help.

HI, My name is Alan. I have three brain injuries. First on was from an auto accident by a person overloaded and doing 40 mph over the speed limit. I want you and your husband to know what happened to me from the doctors and meds I was put on.
First thing you should know I injured my back and was put on a medicine that hid my first TBI. That med was for treating chronic pain, That med hid my first TBI and the seizure disorder I had gotten from the accident.
I had been seizing over twelve hours before I was found. That was the cause of the second TBI.
The third is a simple one. I was prescribed the same medication that had been controlling my seizures for years only change it was generic med not the brand name Keppra is the brand name of the med I need.
It has been a long hard road for me. I put my trust into the people who call themselves doctors
I now use my computer to help find out my treatment and what my meds are and if they interfere with another med.
There are answers out there if you and your husband have the strength and patience to do what it takes to down the road that’s has laid out in front of.
My personal experience is a hard life lays about you. Hold each other for support ask questions at the doctor’s office and pharmacy, and get on that computer and double even triple check your symptoms, the meds, and how you feel after taking them. Notice what frustrates you and try working around it another words take a different direction and try not to repeat it again. If its something you need to relearn work at, but don’t little your self or the ones you love ask them for help. It is not a shame to have to ask to know. I had to know how to swim before I could swim.
Brainbfried since 1983 it took a coma for people to believe me. I thank god every night that I did not kill someone doing my job driving up and down washington state.

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